Never invite your cousin to cook Christmas dinner.....

Christmas December 2006, was going to be special, and it certainly was. We talked Bob into spending Christmas with us, Liam said, "Please come, Mom can't cook and we know that you can!" It's true, Bob is renowned for his culinary expertise, amongst other things.
Wow you should have seen the food we were preparing, Colin was acting as Sous Chef, his carrots were cut to accurately sized strips, aux julienne, him being an engineer was keen to use his mic, so as to be precise to the last mil. Well the day progressed, we all waited with anticipation, saving ourselves for the delights which were to follow.
Time to put the roasters in the oven, 45 minutes and we would be sitting to the table, all 12 of us, mouths watering, Christmas dinner, we wait 12 months for the pleasure!
Bob opened the oven door, tray of par boiled potatoes in hand. Not enough room, only a small oven, just need to make some space. Oven gloves at the ready................
"Oh bollo*ks!!!!!! the bird is fu*king cold!" exclaimed Mr Lavender.
"Yer, that's really funny " I laughed.
Only when Bob put his head in the oven did I believe him! Not sure why he did that, it's electric, so no good in times of extreme desperation..... All I can say is, no-one asked me to switch the oven on.....it may be my kitchen but I don't see what that's got to do with it! Hahaha.
Then reality checked in! Liam and Emma announced calmly but firmly, "We are going to Dad's for a bacon sandwich."
And so it was, Christmas dinner 2006. A strange affair, as Sarah said, it's the first Christmas where we have weighed less on Boxing Day than before the celebrations!!!!!!!!